Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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