New invention idea: vibrating tampons
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize