i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I can't wait until next week, when I find out what drunk me added to the Netflix queue.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Randomize
