i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
This girl is more easily done than said...
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
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