Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Dude did I even see you at the bar. Cause I was for sure there then the next second apparently I was crying next to my Christmas tree because nobody believed in me.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
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