Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
