ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
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