Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
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