yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
