That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
My date just wheeled me home in a shopping cart but it was normal
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Omg you can't vacuum salsa that's just ridiculous
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize