SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
