Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
Randomize
