I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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