I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
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