Heybabeimwearingurpanties
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Theres a note on my antibiotics that says "Do not chew or crush. Swallow whole." I think that would be a good tattoo for just above my penis.
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I honestly think the worst part about the night is they just kicked us out of the park and we didn't even get to go into Disneyland Jail
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
