You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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