We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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