I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
