Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
