he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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