Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
