Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
i swear a herd of elephants who like to smoke weed lives directly above our room
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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