i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
Randomize
