i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
I shaved my balls for you. Do you have any idea how hard that is?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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