i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Hey, if I can't get it and you're still alive, can you get the glass out of my foot? Happy Sunday.
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
When I took off my jeans he became more excited about my Elmo underwear than sex but to be fair, who can blame him. They're awesome undies.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize