I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
Randomize
