My bra smells like weed because there's weed in my bra
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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