I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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