is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
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