The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize
