Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
why is there a shopping cart in my back seat? and a dick drawn on the side of my car?
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
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