In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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