I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
i'm just sitting here going through her tagged pics, covering up different parts of her face to try and figure out exactly what it is that makes her so ugly.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize
