remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
They still haven't come up with a cure for a hangover; good luck cancer.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
There are parrots here and they're headbanging to the music. There's also a clown and a pit bull that can jump onto tables. Too high for this shit.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm to sober to make life ruining decisions and alcohol is to expensive at this bar for me to fear that level of drunk happening
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I successfully navigated a full, lengthy interaction with my dad in which he never asked me if I was freshly baked. 10 points.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
