I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
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