He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Diet Starts Tomorrow! Guy from McDonalds asked if I got a new car...
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
Randomize
