dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I was the one passing out cake at the bars
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
