So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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