Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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