Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Randomize