Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
