i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I have post one night stand depression
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
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