Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
