Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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