His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
too bad you live with your parents still
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
