another moral hangover. fuck.
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
There needs to be a term for a female version of a rusty trombone
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize