booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
