that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
