I just found out you can file for divorce online. I love America.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
Hey remember that thing i said about never apologizing for being a hot mess? Well that was before you found me drunk in the hallway with no pants.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize
