I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
