I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
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