like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
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